I'll never understand...

I'll never understand how we can allow ourselves to hurt, or how we can let people in that we know are going to hurt us.  I'll never understand why as humans we need to love and be loved.  I'll never understand how you can call someone your "best friend" and then turn around and stab them in the back or how you can make yourself the victim in every situation.  I'll never understand how we can give advice but never take our own or how no matter how long its been since your first love, it always hurts knowing that they got away.  I'll never understand that the pain that is caused in your life helps shape the person you become.  I'll never understand how we always think about the one person that "got away" and never think about what's right in front of us.  I'll never understand how you and another person can have mutual feelings for each other but not let them happen because of outside factors or how no strings attached becomes much more than you ever imagined it to be.

One day I want to know what it's like to be loved again.  I want to have that feeling of knowing that someone is thinking about you at some point in the day and wondering what you're doing.  I just miss the feelings of being with someone who truly loves you back.  I have no idea of whether or not I'm going to get it again but I can only hope that one day someone will love me again.  And I can't help but reminisce on what used to be. I miss it so much it hurts.

These are the things that I will never understand and maybe I'm not supposed to but right now I really need answers and I'm not getting any.  Oh well, I guess life will move on.. With or without me, so I have to make the best of it....

It's almost 5 in the morning so I must go to bed and get some rest... and I'm done rambling...

Loves <3